


Aurora Borealis

by NicoleCollard



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Day 1: Freaky weather, Episode Fix-it: s08e04 The Last of the Starks, F/M, Jaime/Brienne Appreciation Week 2019, Northern Lights, Winterfell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-11-08 10:29:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20833958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NicoleCollard/pseuds/NicoleCollard
Summary: After sleeping with Brienne for the first time, Jaime feels the need to talk to her about their relationship. Will he be able to tell the wench everything he feels? Will nature be kind enough to help him find the words?





	Aurora Borealis

**Author's Note:**

> I want to join the celebrations for JBOnline 'JB Appreciation Week 2019' with this story. It was supposed to be a drabble, but it got out of hand. I hope you all like it!

Jaime had had some problems to go to sleep last night. The battle against the dead was still so vivid in his mind that, when he closed his eyes, he could still see those creepy wights coming for him. Besides, he had drunk too much for his tastes during the feast and alcohol always made him feel uncomfortable. Apparently, he wasn't just the stupidest Lannister, but the weakest one too. He didn't exactly regret drinking, though, because it had been the only way to muster the courage to knock on Brienne's door and go after what he so desperately wanted.

It had been glorious. Jaime had dreamed of that moment more times than he could remember or even wanted to admit, but reality had exceeded even his highest expectations. Brienne was fierce and gentle, passionate and sweet. She made love the same way she did everything: putting her whole heart in it. That morning when he woke up at last, Brienne wasn't in bed anymore, and Jaime missed her warm body pressed against his, her foreign but wanted kisses all over his neck, the light in her blue eyes when she fixed her gaze on him... She was so pure, so real, so special. He admired the wench more than he had admired anyone else in his life, which made him feel honoured that she had decided to allow him in her bed.

And now that he had time to think of it, with no pressure over his feelings or next actions for the first time in what seemed like ages, Jaime started to admit that it wasn't just admiration what he felt for Brienne, and that made him nervous. He desired her body, but he also longed to be around her all the time. Watching her spar or train people was a delight, seeing her blush whenever he teased her was endearing, spotting a smile on her usually serious face was the most beautiful thing Jaime had experienced. Making her happy had suddenly become one of his main goals in life.

But he was so bad at talking about his feelings that he always ruined it when he was in Brienne's presence. Yes, that was Jaime Lannister: the man who didn't hesitate to charge a full-grown dragon with only a spear in his hand but wasn't able to maintain a normal conversation with the woman he loved. He definitely needed to talk to Brienne and sort things out between the two of them. At least, trying to be honest with her could be a good start. After all, he had been the one to take her maidenhead -with her consent, of course-, but she deserved to know how important she really was to him, because he wasn't sure he had made it clear enough the the night before.

So since the moment he left her chambers that morning, Jaime spent his day trying to find Brienne, but without success. Where could she be? At some point throughout the evening, he realised she might be avoiding him. Maybe she wasn't at all comfortable with what they had done last night. Or maybe she regretted it. Or maybe she was ashamed of him. Jaime's heart was a complete mess, but he knew that he still needed to keep looking for Brienne and make a point, even if she ended up rejecting his advances, which he would totally understand.

At dinner, Jaime felt so uneasy that he had to ask Pod for his lady's whereabouts, and the boy informed him with a mixture of guilt and complicity that made Jaime want to hug him.

Brienne was keeping watch on the battlements. Even if, apparently, there were no more foes coming from the North, the Starks had decided to keep an eye on there night and day while they rebuilt Winterfell, just in case. Jaime knew Brienne didn't have to keep watch herself, but she liked to supervise the men.

While he climbed what was left of the stony stairs, Jaime kept rehearsing the words he wanted to tell Brienne. His heart beat fiercely in his chest, sending adrenaline all over his body as if he were going to start a fight. But when he finally reached the crenels where she was supposed to be, and he saw her standing there, Jaime forgot how to speak and his heart stopped suddenly.

Brienne's back was to him, her fur cloak tightly tied around her strong shoulders. Jaime could only distinguish her silhouette against the night sky and it made him swallow in awe. Some strange lights adorned the sky, as if someone were waving huge, liquid, coloured flags to celebrate their victory. Jaime had never seen something like that before. The bright lights seemed to be dancing around Brienne, and Jaime couldn't tear his eyes off the amazing natural display in front of him. Brienne looked like a goddess being greeted by the elements. The Maiden, the Warrior, the Mother, the Father, the Smith, the Crone, the Stranger... All of them reincarnated in one woman.

When Brienne heard his muffled steps behind her, she looked at him over her shoulder and tightened her jaw, but she didn't move. Not that Jaime was in a state to pay attention to those simple details after the epiphany he had just had.

“What... are those”, he asked in a low voice.

“They're called Northern Lights”, Brienne answered without looking at him. “Nobody truly knows why they appear. Samwell Tarly thinks it has something to do with some kinds of particles hitting the clouds, or the sky, or the ice. The North legends say the spirits of those who recently died come back to say their goodbyes.”

“And what do you think?”, Jaime turned his head to look at Brienne's profile.

“I... don't know what to think.”

She lowered her eyes, and Jaime knew her answer had nothing to do with the Northern Lights. The greens, the blues danced over the pale skin of her face, washing away the scars and bruises. _In this light, she is a beauty, she is a knight_, Jaime thought, his feelings resurfacing all of a sudden.

“Brienne, look, I... I need to talk to you. About last night-”

“You don't have to explain anything”, she cut him off, a slight shade of fear in her features.

“But I want to”, Jaime took a deep breath. “You're too important to me for you to go on with your life without being aware of it.”

That got her attention. Brienne's eyes were on his suddenly, her brow a bit furrowed.

“I didn't go to your chambers last night because I needed any... release”, Jaime swallowed hard. “I didn't go because I were drunk either, because I wasn't that wasted. I did it consciously. I followed you because... because I didn't want to be in any other place but your bed yesterday. By your side”, Jaime stopped talking, his face full of emotion, and then he looked at the sky above them before going on. “Brienne, you are my Northern Light.”

Her eyes got even bigger and she blushed. “What do you mean?”

“I mean you're the most odd but wonderful human being in the world. To me, you're like those Northern Lights: unreachable, but breathtaking at the same time. I can't tear my eyes off you, even if your light blinds me everytime I hold your gaze. You're too pure for my tainted soul and I know I don't deserve you, but I feel so honoured that you... that you made me the chosen one, that you decided to share your first time with me.”

Now Brienne's eyes were full of tears. And there they were again, the Northern Lights reflected on her beautiful, sapphire oceans. Jaime took a step closer to her and reached tentatively for her gloved fingers with his only hand.

“Sometimes, when I'm nervous and I don't know what to do, I keep talking”, Jaime excused himself.

“I know”, Brienne looked at him with a shy smile on her lips and Jaime smiled back.

“What I mean is that I can't promise you everything is going to be alright, Brienne, because I've learned the hardest way that love is not about being 'the two of us against the rest of the world'. You try to be happy without paying attention to the signs and then the world slaps you hard. I'm not a good man, and you know it. But I would want to try and build a 'two of us' with you, if you'll have me.”

With a sudden movement, Brienne disentangled her fingers from his grip and cupped Jaime's face with both hands.

“Please, Jaime, don't ever say that again. You are a good man, and I know it better than anyone. I let you in last night consciously too, even if I thought that you would break my heart at some point in the future”, Brienne said with a lump in her throat. “But I had never felt so alive before in my life. I'm scared but I think I'm ready to try.”

“It's not in my plans to hurt you, my lady”, Jaime threw his arm and stump around her armoured waist, his breath rushed. “I would never forgive myself. Brienne, I don't know what the future will hold. I can't promise you I'll always be here to protect you. I confess to you that I still think of Cersei sometimes, I still can't get her fully out of my head, but I want you to help me forget her bad influence. It's so selfish of me to ask this of you, but I've never loved anyone as much as I love you. And I would want to start a new life by your side, away from my family and past.”

Brienne closed her eyes and finally let the tears run down her cheeks. Stepping even closer, Jaime hugged her tight and she hid her face in his neck.

“I'm a flawed man, Brienne. But you've changed my life. I'm not the same Jaime Lannister you led to King's Landing in chains so many years ago. I left that place and that life for good when I finally dared to come North, all because I fell in love with you. Let me be your shield, let me be your companion, let me be the night sky where your light will shine.”

Gently, Brienne raised her head from his neck and fixed her eyes on his, their faces incredibly close.

“Ser Jaime Lannister”, she said in a strangled low voice. “I'll have a promise from you: you will start seeing your worth. You'll stop hating yourself. You'll be an equal to me. Do you think you could do that?”

Swallowing hard, Jaime nodded. “I think so.”

Brienne nodded too, her heart pounding hard against her ribs.

“Then, let me be your shield. Let me be your companion. Let me be the night sky where your light will shine too”, she said staring at him so intently that Jaime thought that he will combust at any moment. When he nodded again, Brienne smiled softly and asked, “Will you marry me?”

Jaime had never felt so light in his life. With a carefree laugh that wiped away all the tension in his body, he leapt forward and kissed Brienne's lips with passion. When both their lips were swollen and damp after an uncountable amount of kisses and bites, Jaime whispered “Yes, Ser Brienne of Tarth. Of course I'll marry you” against her mouth and leaned back to tell it to her with his eyes too.

Without saying another word, Brienne and Jaime stood on the battlements hand in hand contemplating the Northern Lights. Nobody knew what would happen in the war for the Iron Throne. Jaime still didn't know if there would be an afterwards for him. But he knew that he had been granted a second chance at life and love, that the Gods had thrown Brienne in his way for that reason and he was determined to do it right this time.

And suddenly, with a smile on his lips, Jaime thought that the first daughter he had with Brienne, because he intended to have more than one, would be called Aurora, as a reminder of the night he had finally dared to be his own man and Brienne had made him the happiest man alive.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and Happy JB Week!


End file.
